Skip the Valentine's Day Aisle
The marketing folks at the mall have decided to emblazon everything from boxer shorts to stuffed animals with red hearts, but that doesn't mean they make great Valentine's Day gifts. The thoughtful present is the one that counts. Take the time to listen to clues for what she or he really wants. This might be a book that they mentioned looks interesting, or if they're a collector, something new for their collectibles shelf. Most guys would far rather have a pair of tickets to their favorite sports team than a bunch of flowers, and many girls would rather have those tickets than an impersonal heart-shaped box of chocolates.
Amazingly Delicious and Unique Chocolates
For some, it just wouldn't be Valentine's Day without that box of chocolates. This year, don't just pick up a cheap box from the drug store, get something really special. Make sure you include a card with a long paragraph about how much your Valentine means to you.
Make Jewelry Special
One of the most traditional Valentine's gifts can be made special with a little time -- personalize your gift with engraving. Include that secret pet name, or an inside joke that makes you smile. The thought will be romantic and sweet. Check out these wedding ring engravings for ideas.
Comfy and Sexy Lingerie
Guys, don't go the stiletto heels and crotchless panties route unless she wears that sort of thing frequently already. Make sure that valentine's lingerie is as much for her as it is for you. I love this Honeydew chemise which is sexy but also a comfortable cotton. For a slightly sexier look, try this lacy bra and boy short set. Girls, be daring. Surprise him by picking him up from work in a long coat with nothing but a new teddy on underneath! Now that's lingerie both of you can enjoy.
Dress up the bedroom
If giving lingerie for Valentine's Day is too predictable for you, take it a step further by dressing up the bedroom. Buy a new set of luxurious sheets 600-thread count Egyptian cotton. Set a bouquet of flowers next to the bed, and decorate with candles and rose petals. You'll enjoy the ambiance on February 14th, but you'll also get to enjoy those sheets for a long time to come.
Time with Friends
This is a great one for couples that are friendly with other couples. You and your pals can join together to each give her and her pals plane tickets for a "girl's weekend", or him and his friends tickets for a "boys weekend". She or he will love that you were so thoughtful and will know that you planned ahead.
Time with Each Other
Most couples get so busy, especially during wedding planning, that they hardly have any time to spend together. Plan activities for the future that will be romantic time together. The present could be tickets to a new play, a picnic basket with a note about using it during the upcoming summer, or a spa gift certificate for couples treatments. She or he will enjoy knowing that you are thinking about your future together.
Tuesday, February 9, 2010
Tuesday, February 2, 2010
Valentine's Gift Ideas for Men
Valentine's Day is a day set aside for you to tell the man in your life how much you love and appreciate him. And the gift is the best and most convenience way to show how much he means to you. So each of you wants to choose some great gifts for the one you love. But the key is how? Many of you may have some trouble in finding the perfect gifts. And today I will list down the top 5 gift ideas for him for 2010 Valentine's Day, hoping that it may be of some help to you.
Clothing
Plain as clothing are, but they are never to be outdated as gifts, especially as Valentine's Day gifts. Why? That's because you can always get some clothes that are "special and stylish" in your eyes, no matter how changeable the fashion trend is, for example, Ed hardy T-shirts and baseball hats. And if you can get a limited edition of Ed hardy T-shirt for the man you love, he will be excited, absolutely.
Jewelry
Both man and women need the decoration of jewelry which has become an indispensable ornament nowadays. Thus if you choose jewelry as valentine's gifts, your guy will be very happy to accept. Just make sure that the jewellery you choose is right to his taste and style.
Chocolate
It is acknowledged that chocolate is a perfect gift for women on Valentine's Day. But actually, chocolate is also a great gift idea for men. Maybe men do not like sweets as much as women, but they do like the chocolate you send to them. So just try to give a box of chocolate to the man you love on 2010 Valentine's Day, it will turn to be a great surprise to him.
CDs or DVDs
If the one you love is always on the edge of the next big CD or DVD, then this gift will turn out to be the perfect choice. Just try to listen to him when he is talking about which CD or movie he really wants but hasn't picked up. Buy it online for him, and he will be moved.
Hope all of you can get the perfect Valentine's gift for the one you love and hope all of you can enjoy a great and wonderful Valentine's Day.
Clothing
Plain as clothing are, but they are never to be outdated as gifts, especially as Valentine's Day gifts. Why? That's because you can always get some clothes that are "special and stylish" in your eyes, no matter how changeable the fashion trend is, for example, Ed hardy T-shirts and baseball hats. And if you can get a limited edition of Ed hardy T-shirt for the man you love, he will be excited, absolutely.
Jewelry
Both man and women need the decoration of jewelry which has become an indispensable ornament nowadays. Thus if you choose jewelry as valentine's gifts, your guy will be very happy to accept. Just make sure that the jewellery you choose is right to his taste and style.
Chocolate
It is acknowledged that chocolate is a perfect gift for women on Valentine's Day. But actually, chocolate is also a great gift idea for men. Maybe men do not like sweets as much as women, but they do like the chocolate you send to them. So just try to give a box of chocolate to the man you love on 2010 Valentine's Day, it will turn to be a great surprise to him.
CDs or DVDs
If the one you love is always on the edge of the next big CD or DVD, then this gift will turn out to be the perfect choice. Just try to listen to him when he is talking about which CD or movie he really wants but hasn't picked up. Buy it online for him, and he will be moved.
Hope all of you can get the perfect Valentine's gift for the one you love and hope all of you can enjoy a great and wonderful Valentine's Day.
Tuesday, January 26, 2010
Romantic Ways to Celebrate February 14th
Whether you and your partner have just begun dating, or have been in a serious relationship for quite a while, Valentine’s Day is a time to reflect on the value of your love for each other. Stumped for thoughts on how to celebrate? Read on.
Home Dates
Make a romantic dinner at home together. If you both love to cook and experiment, try something new. Even if it doesn’t turn out you’ll have fun with the prep work. Put on a nice tablecloth, candles, and fire up some romantic music to round out the night.
Leave a trail of flower petals to surprise your mate when he or she gets home. Or, how about a treasure hunt? Create notes along the stops to remind your sweetie how much you love him or her. Your notes don’t have to be lengthy, but they should be specific to make them special.
Forget the park! A carpet picnic can be just as romantic. Spread out on a blanket, light lots of candles, and prepare foods you’d normally eat outside on a sunny day. Or, for a twist, get a heart-shaped pizza. Don’t forget the wine. For dessert, make a chocolate fondue. Cut small pieces of cheesecake and dip for a delectable treat.
A Night Out
Every couple has a favorite date where they shared a special memory. Perhaps it was the night you first said, “I love you.” Maybe it was a night where everything seemed to go wrong, yet you had fun anyway. Or maybe your special night is the very first time you went out, when you were both nervous and excited.
Take those favorite memories and recreate them. Go to the same place, order the same foods, and reminisce about the fun you had and the way you felt. Reliving your happiest moments will help you realize how much you mean to each other.
Instead of dinner at one place, choose appetizers at a few favorite restaurants. Don’t forget to pick a romantic place at the end for dessert and champagne.
Creative Date Ideas
Give your partner something she’ll truly appreciate by thinking about what she's always wanted to do. A spa day? Day at the links? Day without housework? After you spend a few hours having some much-needed relaxing time, come back together at the end of a day and enjoy an evening just for two.
Get into the arts. Nothing inspires romance like great paintings or literature. Poetry readings and exhibits pop up throughout the country around February 14th. Check out your local paper. End the date with a creative gift of your own, such as a shadow box with a few cherished memories placed inside, a limerick, or even a love note.
Give your partner a year's worth of dates. Buy a box of kiddie Valentines and write down one different date idea for each week of the year. Then place them in a decorative box just like you did in school. Tell your sweetie he can pull out one early, and use that as a guide for your Valentine’s Day date.
Your weekly date ideas don’t need to be complicated. How about a homemade dinner, DVD night with the movie of your partner’s choice, an educational date, museum tour, concert, picnic, theme night, and on and on. Use your imagination to make it specific to your love. Remember that it’s the time you spend together which will mean the most to your relationship.
Home Dates
Make a romantic dinner at home together. If you both love to cook and experiment, try something new. Even if it doesn’t turn out you’ll have fun with the prep work. Put on a nice tablecloth, candles, and fire up some romantic music to round out the night.
Leave a trail of flower petals to surprise your mate when he or she gets home. Or, how about a treasure hunt? Create notes along the stops to remind your sweetie how much you love him or her. Your notes don’t have to be lengthy, but they should be specific to make them special.
Forget the park! A carpet picnic can be just as romantic. Spread out on a blanket, light lots of candles, and prepare foods you’d normally eat outside on a sunny day. Or, for a twist, get a heart-shaped pizza. Don’t forget the wine. For dessert, make a chocolate fondue. Cut small pieces of cheesecake and dip for a delectable treat.
A Night Out
Every couple has a favorite date where they shared a special memory. Perhaps it was the night you first said, “I love you.” Maybe it was a night where everything seemed to go wrong, yet you had fun anyway. Or maybe your special night is the very first time you went out, when you were both nervous and excited.
Take those favorite memories and recreate them. Go to the same place, order the same foods, and reminisce about the fun you had and the way you felt. Reliving your happiest moments will help you realize how much you mean to each other.
Instead of dinner at one place, choose appetizers at a few favorite restaurants. Don’t forget to pick a romantic place at the end for dessert and champagne.
Creative Date Ideas
Give your partner something she’ll truly appreciate by thinking about what she's always wanted to do. A spa day? Day at the links? Day without housework? After you spend a few hours having some much-needed relaxing time, come back together at the end of a day and enjoy an evening just for two.
Get into the arts. Nothing inspires romance like great paintings or literature. Poetry readings and exhibits pop up throughout the country around February 14th. Check out your local paper. End the date with a creative gift of your own, such as a shadow box with a few cherished memories placed inside, a limerick, or even a love note.
Give your partner a year's worth of dates. Buy a box of kiddie Valentines and write down one different date idea for each week of the year. Then place them in a decorative box just like you did in school. Tell your sweetie he can pull out one early, and use that as a guide for your Valentine’s Day date.
Your weekly date ideas don’t need to be complicated. How about a homemade dinner, DVD night with the movie of your partner’s choice, an educational date, museum tour, concert, picnic, theme night, and on and on. Use your imagination to make it specific to your love. Remember that it’s the time you spend together which will mean the most to your relationship.
Monday, January 18, 2010
In Christian Dating is Chemistry important or not?
Attraction is an important ingredient in dating, even in Christian dating circles. Many Christian singles are guided by whether or not they “feel” an attraction toward a person of the opposite gender. The physical attraction toward another person is often capsulated under the term “chemistry.” I suggest that this is one of the most misunderstood areas connected with a potential Christian dating relationships.
Many Christian men and Christian women are told after a few dates that, while there may have been chemistry initially, there is no longer a chemistry felt for them. Because there is no chemistry the person has decided to drop the Christian dating relationship and pursue another direction. It can be a very devastating time in the life of a single Christian.
I strongly believe that too much focus is being placed on chemistry, or physical attraction. Allow me to share some points that I believe need to be understood by Christian singles when considering chemistry:
· Many marriages in the Old Testament were arranged. Jacob is one of those who had “chemistry” toward Rachel, only to find that he had married Leah.
· A fact of life is that we have been conditioned by society to look for the physical attributes of other Christian singles first. This is like having dessert before you eat your veggies.
· It is a well-established fact in both secular and Christian counseling that sexual satisfaction grows with a relationship.
· People that had “chemistry” initially and lose it after dating a few times never had chemistry in the beginning. They had a fantasy and were attracted to what they wanted the connection to become, versus what it really was. Such approaches are self-serving and damaging to other Christian singles. If you find yourself being guided in this manner get a reality check and learn how to look for the essential ingredients first.
· I find it absolutely fascinating to find that many previously married Christian men and Christian women are often consumed to not “repeat” the sexual incompatibility of their previous marriage. What is interesting is that BOTH of them move into a new marriage and enjoy sex like they never have before. My observation is that it was not sexual incompatibility in the previous marriage that was the difficulty. It was one or both of them not addressing the underlying relationship issues that need to be fed and present BEFORE good sex can take place. Conversely, Christian singles who so highly demand sexual compatibility in a new marriage are often the ones to marry again and not have it. They think that a good sexual relationship in dating is a good indicator of sex after marriage. It is NOT! If the man or women does not take the time to discover their part in contributing to the lack of sexual satisfaction in the previous marriage, the odds are huge that they will repeat the same cycle. Good intentions have little to do with reality. Recall the old saying “the road to hell is paved with good intentions.” God does know best on this one when He says to wait until marriage for sex.
· If the chemistry is the RESULT of building a strong foundation for the Christian dating relationship in the other areas, it is a great thing. If chemistry is measured prior to building the foundation and growing the Christian dating relationship, it is leading with FEELINGS and nothing more. If you choose to lead with your feelings, you will have great difficulty in finding the “right” person and will be in a vicious cycle of searching….and searching…and……
· Instead of leading with chemistry, I encourage dating, Christian singles to look for all those traits and qualities you desire in a mate. Character and behavioral traits are much more important foundational elements for determining the potential of a good relationship.
· I am not saying that Christian singles should ignore physical attraction. I am saying that it needs to be only one of many considerations, made with proper timing.
· Take the time to get to really know another person. Spend time in prayer seeking God’s guidance about the Christian dating relationship. Invite the input of trusted and wise friends and family. If you see that the relationship is not moving in an affirming direction in a reasonable time, discuss it openly with the other person. Pray about it and affirm each other as individuals. Do not force a relationship, but do give it time to surface any potential.
· Telling another single Christian that you do not find chemistry in the relationship and want to move on is really an immature way to handle a very vulnerable situation. I believe it would be better to bathe it in prayer and openly be considerate of one another.
· If someone comes to you after a period of relating and tells you that they have been seeking God’s guidance in your Christian dating relationship and do not have a peace about pursuing it, tell them to pray with you about it. Honor their position and take it up with God. Share your heart with God and tell him that you value the potential of the relationship, but trust Him to provide for you in the future.
Do you want to continue to receive the same results that you have experienced in the past? You will, if you continue to approach life in the same way. Ask God’s Spirit to give you wisdom and discernment in your Christian dating relationships and all areas of your life. He hungers to lead you down a more fulfilling path to joy and peace.
Many Christian men and Christian women are told after a few dates that, while there may have been chemistry initially, there is no longer a chemistry felt for them. Because there is no chemistry the person has decided to drop the Christian dating relationship and pursue another direction. It can be a very devastating time in the life of a single Christian.
I strongly believe that too much focus is being placed on chemistry, or physical attraction. Allow me to share some points that I believe need to be understood by Christian singles when considering chemistry:
· Many marriages in the Old Testament were arranged. Jacob is one of those who had “chemistry” toward Rachel, only to find that he had married Leah.
· A fact of life is that we have been conditioned by society to look for the physical attributes of other Christian singles first. This is like having dessert before you eat your veggies.
· It is a well-established fact in both secular and Christian counseling that sexual satisfaction grows with a relationship.
· People that had “chemistry” initially and lose it after dating a few times never had chemistry in the beginning. They had a fantasy and were attracted to what they wanted the connection to become, versus what it really was. Such approaches are self-serving and damaging to other Christian singles. If you find yourself being guided in this manner get a reality check and learn how to look for the essential ingredients first.
· I find it absolutely fascinating to find that many previously married Christian men and Christian women are often consumed to not “repeat” the sexual incompatibility of their previous marriage. What is interesting is that BOTH of them move into a new marriage and enjoy sex like they never have before. My observation is that it was not sexual incompatibility in the previous marriage that was the difficulty. It was one or both of them not addressing the underlying relationship issues that need to be fed and present BEFORE good sex can take place. Conversely, Christian singles who so highly demand sexual compatibility in a new marriage are often the ones to marry again and not have it. They think that a good sexual relationship in dating is a good indicator of sex after marriage. It is NOT! If the man or women does not take the time to discover their part in contributing to the lack of sexual satisfaction in the previous marriage, the odds are huge that they will repeat the same cycle. Good intentions have little to do with reality. Recall the old saying “the road to hell is paved with good intentions.” God does know best on this one when He says to wait until marriage for sex.
· If the chemistry is the RESULT of building a strong foundation for the Christian dating relationship in the other areas, it is a great thing. If chemistry is measured prior to building the foundation and growing the Christian dating relationship, it is leading with FEELINGS and nothing more. If you choose to lead with your feelings, you will have great difficulty in finding the “right” person and will be in a vicious cycle of searching….and searching…and……
· Instead of leading with chemistry, I encourage dating, Christian singles to look for all those traits and qualities you desire in a mate. Character and behavioral traits are much more important foundational elements for determining the potential of a good relationship.
· I am not saying that Christian singles should ignore physical attraction. I am saying that it needs to be only one of many considerations, made with proper timing.
· Take the time to get to really know another person. Spend time in prayer seeking God’s guidance about the Christian dating relationship. Invite the input of trusted and wise friends and family. If you see that the relationship is not moving in an affirming direction in a reasonable time, discuss it openly with the other person. Pray about it and affirm each other as individuals. Do not force a relationship, but do give it time to surface any potential.
· Telling another single Christian that you do not find chemistry in the relationship and want to move on is really an immature way to handle a very vulnerable situation. I believe it would be better to bathe it in prayer and openly be considerate of one another.
· If someone comes to you after a period of relating and tells you that they have been seeking God’s guidance in your Christian dating relationship and do not have a peace about pursuing it, tell them to pray with you about it. Honor their position and take it up with God. Share your heart with God and tell him that you value the potential of the relationship, but trust Him to provide for you in the future.
Do you want to continue to receive the same results that you have experienced in the past? You will, if you continue to approach life in the same way. Ask God’s Spirit to give you wisdom and discernment in your Christian dating relationships and all areas of your life. He hungers to lead you down a more fulfilling path to joy and peace.
Monday, January 11, 2010
Christian Dating Advice: "How can I be sure that my Christian Dating Relationship is in God's will?"
As I relate to Christian singles, I often receive an email that includes something about God’s will in it. Perhaps the person says, “We met last week/month in a Christian Dating site on the Internet and it has become evident to each of us that our new Christian Dating relationship is God’s will.” Or it will surface in a question “What’s is God’s will that I do about….?”
I certainly believe in God’s will and know that Christ says that we should be busy doing the will of His/our Father. However the other words that follow in the emails often reflect a “rushing” toward a desired victory or success in Christian dating that seems premature.
Other emails received about Christian dating and God’s will convey a heartbreaking story sharing how they just knew the Christian dating relationship was God’s will, but now the marriage, sex, or rejection is tearing them apart and they are very confused.
Allow me to share some thoughts as relates to God’s will and Christian dating – especially as it relates to Christian dating using the Internet:
If you find yourself discussing marriage after only a few emails and you have never met face-to-face, I do not believe that God’s will could be known at this stage. Slow down and let a thorough process reveal if this is the right/best Christian dating relationship for you.
God uses others in our lives to confirm His will for us. No, they will not be perfect but they can give you some great insights. Do not ask someone who you think will just say, “Go for it!” Pray and think about who in your family and close friends are Christians and will pray with you about the developing Christian dating relationship.
Always seek the counsel of a licensed marriage counselor or a Pastor trained in counseling. They can bring spiritual and practical applications to your understanding that are very important for success in Christian dating. Do not go once and think that is enough. It will be a process over many sessions.
Step back from the Christian dating relationship and ask yourself some hard questions.
- “What is it about this person that I cannot live without?”
- “What is it about this person that would be very annoying after marriage?”
- Make a list of the pluses and minuses and look at them long and hard. If you do not know enough about them to make a list – especially on the negative side, you need to give the Christian dating relationship a lot more time. Everyone has negatives and if you do not see any, then I suggest that you are not seeing ALL of them.
It is wonderful to find someone with whom you can pray and discuss things of God. This is an essential ingredient to a strong and successful Christian relationship. Long distance prayers via phone and Internet are not the same as doing so in person over an extended period of time. Caution: Prayer develops intimacy and I suggest that this level of praying should not be done at the initial stage of a Christian dating relationship. The intimacy might mask other things that you should be observing while Christian dating takes its course.
What are each of your motivations in using Christian dating on the Internet to find a Christian dating relationship? You are both “hunters” – which is not a bad thing – but you must recognize the forces involved. TAKE TIME and let God confirm to you, over and over, in a variety of ways that this is the Christian dating relationship for you.
One final thought that comes to mind. Is your Christian dating relationship a partnership or is something out of balance with the give and take of the relationship? Are your discussions primarily focused on what satisfies each other? Is the other person self-centered and turns the conversations to themselves frequently? Relationships should be a healthy sharing and caring and not just doing what makes each other feel good.
Christian dating on the Internet is a wonderful vehicle to meet new Christian singles. It also expedites expectations – and they too often get ahead of reality. God can use Christian dating on the Internet to bring someone into your life. He has used it for other Christian singles and this could be the way He will do it for you. But do not rush into any Christian dating relationship too quickly when a great person begins to relate to you. Do your “DUE DILIGENCE”. Allow it time and enjoy the building of a healthy and deep Christian dating relationship. See how the other person is around family and friends. God will reveal His will over time to each of you.
May He guide you as you relate to other Christian singles and build wonderful friendships. Great friendships will develop the opportunity for the one you are seeking into a great Christian dating relationship.
I certainly believe in God’s will and know that Christ says that we should be busy doing the will of His/our Father. However the other words that follow in the emails often reflect a “rushing” toward a desired victory or success in Christian dating that seems premature.
Other emails received about Christian dating and God’s will convey a heartbreaking story sharing how they just knew the Christian dating relationship was God’s will, but now the marriage, sex, or rejection is tearing them apart and they are very confused.
Allow me to share some thoughts as relates to God’s will and Christian dating – especially as it relates to Christian dating using the Internet:
If you find yourself discussing marriage after only a few emails and you have never met face-to-face, I do not believe that God’s will could be known at this stage. Slow down and let a thorough process reveal if this is the right/best Christian dating relationship for you.
God uses others in our lives to confirm His will for us. No, they will not be perfect but they can give you some great insights. Do not ask someone who you think will just say, “Go for it!” Pray and think about who in your family and close friends are Christians and will pray with you about the developing Christian dating relationship.
Always seek the counsel of a licensed marriage counselor or a Pastor trained in counseling. They can bring spiritual and practical applications to your understanding that are very important for success in Christian dating. Do not go once and think that is enough. It will be a process over many sessions.
Step back from the Christian dating relationship and ask yourself some hard questions.
- “What is it about this person that I cannot live without?”
- “What is it about this person that would be very annoying after marriage?”
- Make a list of the pluses and minuses and look at them long and hard. If you do not know enough about them to make a list – especially on the negative side, you need to give the Christian dating relationship a lot more time. Everyone has negatives and if you do not see any, then I suggest that you are not seeing ALL of them.
It is wonderful to find someone with whom you can pray and discuss things of God. This is an essential ingredient to a strong and successful Christian relationship. Long distance prayers via phone and Internet are not the same as doing so in person over an extended period of time. Caution: Prayer develops intimacy and I suggest that this level of praying should not be done at the initial stage of a Christian dating relationship. The intimacy might mask other things that you should be observing while Christian dating takes its course.
What are each of your motivations in using Christian dating on the Internet to find a Christian dating relationship? You are both “hunters” – which is not a bad thing – but you must recognize the forces involved. TAKE TIME and let God confirm to you, over and over, in a variety of ways that this is the Christian dating relationship for you.
One final thought that comes to mind. Is your Christian dating relationship a partnership or is something out of balance with the give and take of the relationship? Are your discussions primarily focused on what satisfies each other? Is the other person self-centered and turns the conversations to themselves frequently? Relationships should be a healthy sharing and caring and not just doing what makes each other feel good.
Christian dating on the Internet is a wonderful vehicle to meet new Christian singles. It also expedites expectations – and they too often get ahead of reality. God can use Christian dating on the Internet to bring someone into your life. He has used it for other Christian singles and this could be the way He will do it for you. But do not rush into any Christian dating relationship too quickly when a great person begins to relate to you. Do your “DUE DILIGENCE”. Allow it time and enjoy the building of a healthy and deep Christian dating relationship. See how the other person is around family and friends. God will reveal His will over time to each of you.
May He guide you as you relate to other Christian singles and build wonderful friendships. Great friendships will develop the opportunity for the one you are seeking into a great Christian dating relationship.
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